8 Conversation Starters For Couples to Build Closeness

a couple having a conversation on the sofa while drinking wineWhen two people first start dating there is a great deal of excitement. The conversation feels effortless and it seems as though there isn’t enough time to get through all of the things you want to talk about.

However, as the relationship continues, you learn more about each other, hear all of the stories, and talk about seemingly everything you possibly can.

In order to stay connected and keep a relationship fresh, couples often need some help with facilitating new, interesting and intriguing conversations in order to keep the attraction spark alive.

So, in this article I will share with you my top eight conversation starters for couples. Whether you’re a new couple, an established couple that needs to liven up their relationship or you’re a couple in a troubled marriage, these tips will help you improve the conversations you have with your significant other.


BOY HACK: How To Make Him Want You, & Only You With Your Words


Eight Interesting Conversation Starters for Couples

Use shows as a conversation starter

When couples watch the same (or at least 1-2 of the same) shows, it creates a time, place, and space for the two of you to take part in a relaxing activity together that you both enjoy.

Not only does it pretty much guarantee spending time together, but it is much more enjoyable to bounce your thoughts on the show(s) off of one another and to hear their perspectives.

There’s an added bonus if you watch something comical because laughing together will strengthen your bond and help to draw you closer.

When two people watch a show or a movie together, when they get into the program they, most of the time, naturally shift brainwaves into alpha. If you are watching the show with your significant other then the two of you shift into the alpha brainwave frequency together, which creates coherence, and therefore, a connection between you on a sub-conscious level.

Therefore, shows give you something to connect over and can help to be a great source of conversation starters.

See also: How to seduce a may with your words

Books as a conversation starter

A fun activity for couples with similar book interests is to start a book together and read it to each other or read individually, but at a similar pace to be able to discuss it.

Similar to when couples share an interest in shows, the experience is often amplified when you can share your thoughts, reactions, and questions with someone else. Plus, it can help you two to feel connected so that you don’t feel ignored or aren’t ignoring your significant other by being lost in a great story.

Another interesting phenomenon of reading a book in unison with another person is that, even though the two of you are reading the exact same book, the content will likely conjure up slightly different images, settings and feelings in each person due to each person’s unique interpretation of the book.

There are a lot of reasons why this occurs, but often comes down to the different life experiences, and therefore, the different belief systems that each person has built up over the years.

So, talking about your interpretation of the book with your significant other will not only be very interesting but also highly revealing about how each of you thinks and feels. Gaining this level of understanding of your partner will help to strengthen the bond that the two of you share.


LIFE HACK: How To Make Him Want You, & Only You With Your Words


a couple reading a book and talking together about the content

Using current events and the news as a conversation starter

Unfortunately, we live in a world where the news is often negative and depressing. But, there are important events that take place that is worthy of discussing.

You can share stories you hear about, discuss your opinions and ask to hear your significant other’s opinion, and so forth.

The good news is that there IS good news too!

Maybe you two can try to find some channels (literal channels and figurative ones – like social media, apps) to listen to/follow good news stories.

For example, Instagram has pages and YouTube has channels of positive news stories only. You can each pick a story or two a day to share with each other to discuss.

If there is a particularly funny or comical story in the news then this will often be a great conversation starter to use the next time you’re with your partner. This will have even greater impact if the humour is similar to your partner’s sense of humour.

See also: How to spice up your relationship with dirty talk

Gratitude as a conversation starter

a woman and her boyfriend lying on a couch looking at each otherA simple, easy, fairly effortless, free, and positive strategy to help with conversation is to practice sharing and hearing three (or more) things that you each are grateful for each day.

Research shows that expressing gratitude has a number of benefits, which include, but are not limited to, an increased level of endorphins (feel-good hormones), a positive shift in perspective and overall improved one’s health.

When you make a conscious effort to share with your partner, the exercise can benefit you both, especially with the added bonus of connection, shared positivity, and even expression of gratitude for each other.

You can do this wherever you are, in any capacity, and at any time that works for you both. Win-win!

More info: The text messages to send him to make him want you

Sharing something you’ve learned in conversation

It’s always enriching to learn new things and one of the ways we can learn and grow is by sharing with each other.

When you learn something new, share it with your partner! When they learn something that they’d like to share with you, be open to listening to what they have to say about it.

Remember that even though it may not be something you’re particularly interested in, it’s important to give your partner validation by showing that you care simply because it is important to THEM.

Sharing your daily experiences

This is one that you must be careful with. Too often couples get into the habit of complaining about their day or focusing on what went wrong, what is stressful, and so forth.

However, being negative only brings you and others down and does not help two people connect if it is a constant in your relationship.

Try to keep the stresses of work behind when you leave for the day, and share positives, interesting things, or other relevant pieces of information that could start a conversation. Listen to your partner when they share with you too.

It might be worth having a conversation with each other to establish some ground rules of sharing about each of your days.

Some suggestions include: leaving negativity at the office, or only allowing an allotted period of time for “complaints”.

Complaining and worrying is normal, so it is okay to do it from time to time, but be aware of how long you’re complaining for, put a conscious end time to it, and remember to focus on the positives too.

See also: What you need to do to get him to commit

Conversations about travel

Plan a trip together or talk about a trip you both would like to go on.

If you have different travel habits and interests, talk to each other about what their ideal trip would be. Where would they go? What’s an ideal period of time to stay in that place? Would they want luxurious or the experience of hostels? What kind of scenery would they want to experience? What food would they want to eat?

Ask them questions to learn about what they would love, even if it’s different from your opinion and be open and receptive to their ideas.

Conversations about food

Try out some new recipes together.

Ask what they may like to try that’s new. Maybe you can set up a plan to have a cooking contest or to surprise each other with a new meal or treat.

You can also research some local restaurants to check out together and share your opinions about the food, decor, and ambience.a man and woman laughing about their marriage together

Final Thoughts

It’s important to maintain your individuality in a relationship and while you likely share many interests and activities together, the more you develop yourself and open yourself up to experiences and learning, the more you will have to offer – even if you’re doing it together!

While these conversation tips will help you to maintain or rebuild the connection you share with your partner, they are by no means extensive.

If you want to make a significant impact on your relationship for the better, deepen the connection the two of you share and make him value you as a person and view you as the only one he wants to be with, then I recommend you check out relationship expert, Mirabelle Summer’s Conversation Chemistry course.

How To Get a Man To Marry You – And Never Leave You

a man proposing to his girlfriendIf you’re in a relationship with a guy but it hasn’t yet progressed to marriage then you propably already know that getting a man to marry you isn’t always an easy thing.

In fact, this scenario may already be familiar to you: You are in a relationship with someone who you love and who you see a future with.

You may be at a point where you are fully ready for the next step of marriage, or if you aren’t quite ready yet, you may be thinking along those lines of moving forward at some point in the near future.

Below are some tips to guide you toward getting your man to marry you when you are ready.

See also: The exact secrets to getting him to propose

Work on yourself

Whether you are in a relationship or not, the most important thing you can do is to continually improve yourself in every aspect. Take care of yourself.

Exercise, eat (mostly) healthy foods, get enough sleep, put your best foot forward with your career, practice emotional regulation, invest time into your social world, and dedicate time to hobbies.

I firmly believe that the most attractive people are the ones who are the most well-rounded. If you are single, you will attract higher quality people by being a higher quality person yourself. If you are in a relationship, you will hold the interest of your partner and you will display the value you offer as an individual, which in turn, will make them want to lock it down with you.

If you are in a committed relationship with the hope of marriage coming around the corner this is even more important because any doubts or hesitancy your partner may be experiencing (which is all very normal), will be easily removed when they are continually reminded of how great you are and how much you continue to grow and become even better.

See also: The signs that a proposal is coming

Connect with his family

Connect with his family and put real, genuine effort into this. Marriage truly extends beyond marrying the person you will call your husband; it involves marrying his family and closest friends as well.

If you truly love this person, be open minded with accepting all of these people, flaws and all. Connecting with his family and/or closest friends will be monumental in his decision to marry you. If you think that these people do not have a say in his decision-making, you are mistaken.

Try to put any judgments and feelings to the side and try your best to be accepting of everyone who is near and dear to him. If you do not have to worry about difficult relationships, good for you!

Embrace them all – good, bad, and indifferent with open arms and understand that these people will play a vital role in your life.

Have a conversation early on

The first thing you MUST do in your relationship is to establish your future goals. Have a conversation to gauge if marriage is a goal for you both. Then, follow up with: do you both want kids? How many? Where do you want to settle down, if you want to at all?

This information is absolutely vital for both of you to determine if your goals are aligned or at least, similar. If you both have different visions of the future, you may need to consider if this relationship has the potential of continuing further. Find this information out early on.

Related article: 5 steps to getting your marriage proposal

Be clear

a man and a woman who have just got marriedNot to be confused with being aggressive, but it is important to be clear about what your expectations are as this will go a long way to protecting against needing to save your marriage later on. Also be fair in your expectations.

Be sure that before considering marrying someone that you both are on the same page with your long-term goals. Once you have that established, it is important for both of you to take the time to get to know each other.

It takes many years to truly know someone, so do yourself a favor and take the time without rushing into anything.

Once you feel confident that this is the person you want to be with, communicate those feelings. Share with them that a goal of yours is to be married and if you have a time frame in mind, share that with them as well.

When you share this, be open to flexibility. For example, say that you tell your partner you want to be engaged by the end of the year; it may be reasonable to be flexible in that by a year and a half to two years.

Meet your partner where he is

Understand his goals, his expectations, what he wants for himself long term and discuss those things. For men, it is typical that he will hesitate because of finances or career goals.

Have an open conversation about his concerns, hesitations, and yours as well. Try to find a happy medium that makes you both comfortable.

See also: The secrets to what guys want in a relationship

Meet each other halfway

Always, on everything – except for anything that compromises your core values. Compromise is an essential element of a happy, healthy relationship.

When you have the conversation solidifying that you both want to get married and when you both decide that your relationship has great potential for marrying each other, meet each other halfway in terms of what that process will be like.

Compromise on timing, finances, what the wedding day itself will look like, and what your future plans are. Express the things you want, but also be mindful and respectful of what your partner wants and meet each other halfway.

Once you have successfully accomplished the above tasks, you will be in a better position for marrying your husband to be. If you find that any of the above topics are an area of difficulty for you, try to be open-minded and understand the root cause of it. However, if you struggle with accomplishing the above tasks, you may have to reconsider if this is what you really want in the future.

How to Save Your Marriage When All Looks Hopeless

a man and woman talking seriously about saving their marriageNo marriage is perfect and often times, it’s far from it. Marriage comes along with commitment, responsibilities, the good, the bad, and the in-between.

After the honeymoon phase has passed and as life presents challenges, it can become easy to feel discouraged about a relationship you were once head over heels in.

If you are feeling that your marriage is struggling, you have come to the right place. Below are six pieces of advice for what you can do actively to help turn your marriage into a positive, safe, and exciting place once again.

See also: The 4 Secret Steps To Recover A Relationship

Six Steps To Saving Your Marriage When You Feel Hopeless

Step 1: Focus on gratitude

Appreciation goes a long way in any type of relationship whether it be romantic, familial, friendship, with coworkers, even with strangers. Every person wants to feel appreciated for his or her efforts despite how big or small they may be. In this very moment, pause to put conscious effort into some of the things your significant other does for you.

Do they bring out the garbage, help the kids with homework, make you coffee in the morning, start your car in the Winter, listen to your concerns about work, or rub your back? Think about all the ways your partner tries to do things for you and identify them in your mind. Also, start paying closer attention because I am sure there are things you aren’t seeing.

When you do realize that your partner is doing something for you or something that will ultimately make your life better, simply say “thank you” to them. Acknowledging the small, daily, efforts helps to encourage more of that. Everybody wins. Express the importance of receiving this appreciation as well, but also continue to do for others simply for the sake of doing and wanting to help.

There are many studies that show that the simple act of saying “Thank You” helps to contribute to, and maintain, a healthy relationship.

Step 2: The gratitude list

Once you start to focus more on the things you are grateful for about your partner, make a list of ten things you appreciate about your husband or wife. You can add things from step 1 (things you’re grateful for that they do), but also think about your partner as a person.

  • What is it about him or her that drew you to them initially?
  • Do you like how they look when they wear that certain outfit or the way they can engage a room socially?
  • What about their thoughtfulness and attentiveness to detail?
  • Do you appreciate their simplicity and laid back personality?
  • Or perhaps their work ethic?

Aim for at least ten things to write down about your partner that you appreciate about them. Keep the list going if you can! When we stop to pause and reflect we allow ourselves the opportunity to pay attention to things we may have been overlooking.

Sometimes you both need some perspective to remind yourselves why you chose this person to begin with, which will bring you back to the simplicity of appreciating this person who you have committed to and who has committed to you.

Step 3: Set aside some time to spend together

Carve out an hour after the kids are asleep or if you can afford it, get a babysitter to go out for dinner once a week. Whatever you can make work, decide on it together and set a number to it. One hour per night? One dinner date per week? 15 minutes of quality time every morning?

Whatever this looks like for you, and whatever you both agree on, put a frequency to it to make sure you can keep yourselves in check. Make sure you agree on this plan together. In order to better your relationship, spending quality time together is of the utmost importance.

Instead of watching your favorite TV show, play a board game or cards. Instead of falling asleep to the TV, turn it off and have a brief conversation about the day. If you can’t think of something to talk about – focus on positivity and gratitude.

Ask your partner to share three things he or she is grateful for and do the same. Find what works for you both to share your thoughts, time, and yourselves with each other.

a married couple holding hands

See also: How to move beyond the fighting

Step 4: Disconnect to reconnect

Disconnect from your phone, social media, and any other device. In order to connect with those around you (in the physical), you must disconnect from the temptations of distraction (phones, TV, etc). So often we allow ourselves to delve into the social or entertainment world to distract ourselves from having to face our own realities.

When you are with your partner, spend mindful time with them in conversation. Ask them questions to express your interest in their day, in what’s going on at work, how their friends are. When they are speaking to you, give them your attention through eye contact, active listening, and minimal distractions. Put your phones and devices away.

Remember that when you listen actively, it is not just a matter of looking at them speak and saying “uh huh” in response. Listening to truly listen does not mean having to provide a response at all. It’s nice if you do, if it’s meaningful. But, what’s more important is to use eye contact to show you are fully engaged, be mindful of your body since body language is a huge part of communication, and to listen to understand.

Step 5: Maintain your individuality

Sometimes martial issues stem from expectations placed on the marriage itself. Maybe you’ve become caught up in the daily routines of work, kids, pets, family, etc.

There is nothing wrong with routine or spending your time in a certain way, but it is important to you as an individual and to your relationship to maintain your individual interests. If you have the time and means to sign up for a class – try it out without your partner (unless of course, they want to join then you can get quality time)!

If you maintain your individual interests and pursue them, even if they are separate from your partner’s interests, it is healthy for you and will carry over positively into your relationship. Check out apps such as GroupOn to see what classes or activities are in your area to try out – anything from Yoga and cooking classes to golfing and photography etc.

Maybe try something you’ve never experienced before to broaden your horizons.

Step 6: Laugh

a man and woman laughing about their marriage togetherLaughter is key in any relationship and any situation. When we can laugh together, we can work through many of our more serious situations.

If you can swing it, make a date night out of it to a comedy club. If you can’t make that happen, pull up some Netflix or another outlet to watch a funny movie or stand up comedy.

When we laugh together we connect on a deeper level and we remind ourselves not to take things so seriously.

Being able to connect in this area can be extremely beneficial in recreating warm, positive feelings in your marriage.

The main thing to keep in mind is that while you may be feeling like your marriage is hopeless, you can remind yourself that you have the power to turn the energy of it around.

If you follow the steps outlined above as a starting point you will be able to work toward shifting back to a point of loving, appreciating, and enjoying the marriage that you have committed to.

A shift in perspective + effort on both ends = the key to revamping your marriage into being more successful and fulfilling.

7 Signs He Wants To Marry You (And Is Ready!)

a man with a wedding ring behind his backIf you’ve been in a relationship for a while and you’re looking for the signs he wants to marry you, it can drive you crazy trying to figure out if and when he is going to pop the question.

But how do you know when he is seriously considering marrying you? And also just as important, what signs tell you that he’s ready?

If you feel you need some help to actually get your guy to do the deed then check out our article all about getting your boyfriend to propose.

Read on to learn the seven best signs that this relationship really is going somewhere.

Signs He Is Ready To Get Married

1: He & You Become “We”

How he talks can be a big giveaway to how he is feeling. If he starts referring to the two of you as ‘we’ then is a great sign that he is thinking of the two of you as a solid couple and may have even started to see himself marrying you (and may have even begun to seriously think about it).

If you notice he is talking more about “we” in the future as opposed to him, especially if he’s bringing you into his future plans for trips or adventures, he had planned before meeting you then he’s definitely keen.

Most men have a short bucket list of events that they really want to achieve from an early age. If “I’ve always wanted to visit Vegas” or “I’ve always wanted to hike the Pacific Crest Trail” becomes wanting to go to Las Vegas with you or feeling out whether or not you would go with him on his dream hiking adventure, then you know he’s looking at his future life with you in it.

If your man is taking his time popping the question or you know he needs a nudge in the right direction, but you’re scared to mess things up or frighten him off the whole idea then be careful what you do next. Discover exactly how to get him to propose to you without coming across as pushy or needy, but instead make him think it’s all his idea with these simple tricks.

2: You’re Wanted & Expected At Family Functions

Most guys are pretty picky about who they bring to family gatherings. If you end up at one picnic or get-together, don’t read too much into it, but if you’re going to birthdays, family reunions, family dinners, that is a huge sign that he sees you as belonging to his family. This can be blood family, friends who are like family, or both.

Some women think that men generally can be a little bit closed emotionally. However, most guys are very protective of those they consider family, and if you’re getting the green light to be a part of that, then you’re definitely being scoped out as potential marriage material.

If it is the first time that you are being invited to such an occasion, then it is highly likely that he will be judging his friends and family members reactions to you. This can be a little intimidating, but don’t worry, just be yourself and do everything you can to come across as warm, friendly and fun to be around.

If he sees that his dear ones are also warming to you, then you will certainly be viewed more favourably in his eyes and it will help to confirm to him that you may be the one.

Once a guy gets the feeling that you are okay by his friends and family he will often open up more emotionally to you and can find himself falling in love with you more easily.

couple-baby-shoe3: He Mentions Kids

Guys don’t joke about having kids. Even if they mention it in passing or in a joking way. That means they’ve actually thought about it. If they mention wanting to be a father, having kids, or anything about how you’d make a great mother, then you’re on the fast track to an engagement proposal.

To have children is extremely serious business and not something that guys take lightly at all. If he is mentioning it in any way, shape, or form, then he’s gauging you as wife and mother material in a very serious way.

4: Subtle & Consistent Changes In Touch

Hugs, kisses, cuddling and hand holding, are all obvious. But does he seem more affectionate than perhaps he once did in the early stages of your relationship? When he hugs or touches you, do you feel emotional content in what he is doing?

Being more affectionate, considerate and caring with you are all good signs that he feels a deeper closeness to you and is considering you as someone more special than just some girl he’s seeing.

Related Article: Signs Your Man Loves You

5: Serious “Couple” Commitments

If he’s pushing to make more couple commitments, that’s a good sign he could be gearing up to propose. While not all couple commitments are the same, getting a series of them in a short time period can be a good sign.

Couple commitments can include:

  • Moving in together
  • Getting a pet together
  • Paying bills together
  • Sharing a bank account
  • Having important conversations like moving to a new location for one of your careers

When it comes to career moves, if he’s willing to move from where he currently is to be with you for the benefit of your career then this is a definite sign of his seriousness about you.

6: Hanging Out With Married Friends

If he wants the two of you to hang out with his married friends, for example hanging out at home for dinner and cards instead of going out clubbing.

When a guy wants to spend more time with married friends, it shows a slowing down from the single life and adopting a more settled lifestyle. If he wants you with him in those get-togethers, he is already (and probably sub-consciously) feeling out life being married to you.

7: He Gets All First Date “Crushy” Again

a guy being romantic with his girlfriendThe beginning of any relationship is generally filled with that giddy excitement, a lot of touchy-feely flirting between the two of you and that certain special bit of energy that can be best described as “school yard crush x 2.”

Then, over time the relationship looks and feels different as it grows in deeper ways. That’s normal, and it’s a sign of maturity and progress.

However, if you notice he suddenly seems giddy again, getting nervous excited or appears to be acting like when you were both dating each other for the first time, there’s a pretty decent chance not only is he thinking about proposing, but he already has the engagement ring picked out and hidden away somewhere.

Try not to read into things too much if you just see one or two of these signs randomly. However, if you’re seeing several of these signs together, then that’s a great sign that wedding bells might be in your not so distant future.

Unfortunately, guys are much more laid back when it comes to marriage than women tend to be. Left to their own devices many guys will literally take years to propose, if at all.

If you don’t want to leave the whole thing to chance and become the last one in your friend group to get married, or worse, risk the years going by year after year with him not even asking you at all, then discover exactly what the mental road blocks are that almost all men have when it comes to marriage and find out how you can quickly and subtly turn it all around so he feels like he can’t be without you and needs you in his life for good.

T Dub is a relationship expert from San Diego who teaches women EXACTLY what to do to get their guy to fully commit to the relationship and take the next step without being manipulative, pushy or playing hard to get. His methods are genius, but actually quite simple to understand and apply once you know how. You can learn about his methods here.

Getting Your Boyfriend To Propose In 5 Simple Steps

a couple getting marriedHow to get your boyfriend to propose can be a tricky business. If you’ve been in a relationship for a while now and you’re wondering when he’s gonna pop the question, it can start to get a little frustrating if there seem to be no signs that he is getting ready to make his move.

However, there are a few important things to consider when it comes to getting a proposal from your man.

So, considering that you have already decided that he is marriage material, and you indeed want to spend the rest of your life with him, the next two questions you need to consider are;

  1. Is he ready to get married?
  2. How can I get him to propose?

This article will cover both important questions and will give you a greater insight into how men think about marriage, what needs to be in place for them to feel that they are ready to pop the question and what you can do to lead him there if he needs some subtle encouragement.

Few things can torment a woman like being in love with a great guy, you’re ready to get engaged, but you’re waiting for him to get around to finally proposing.

It is a common joke in modern society that women mature faster and process their emotions more quickly than men, and while this is almost a stereotype, it is quite true in many relationships. The woman finds herself wanting to be asked the big question, but the guy just isn’t making the move.

So why Do Some Guys Hesitate When it Comes to Marriage?

There are a number of reasons why men hesitate when it comes to marriage proposals.

Some are honestly afraid of commitment, whereas other guys just happen to be in a relationship with someone that they know is someone they are happy dating but don’t necessarily consider marriage material.

This is an extremely important point and comes down to knowing yourself, your standards and your values in a relationship so you know what you bring to the table. Then, once you know this, discovering what your boyfriend holds dear regarding his values in a relationship and the qualities in a person that he looks for when it comes to finding a wife is the next important step.

If your values and ideals match or are very close, then you’re most likely all set. It’s just a case of waiting for him to ask you or subtly steering him in the right direction.

If however, his values and aspirations either don’t match what you want out of life or are way outside of who you feel you are then it may be a good indication to look for someone new.

If there are similarities but also some noticeable differences, then ask yourself if you are willing to make some changes to meet him at his value set.

In other instances, the guy may love things just as they are with you and doesn’t want to rock the boat.

Regardless, pretty much all men have a few predictable mental blocks when it comes to getting married. Because of this, relationship expert T Dub from San Diego has carved out exact strategies for women to be able to uncover exactly what their man’s mental road blocks are and get him to commit without being pushy or manipulative.

If you want to listen to T Dub explaining his techniques then click here.

Find Out if He is Ready

a happy couple discussing marriageEven if you have been in a relationship with him for a number of years, doesn’t necessarily mean that he is ready to commit to a marriage.

Guys often think of marriage differently that women and will need to be at a place where they feel it is the right time.

This often comes down to having sufficiently experienced certain things in life, such as time with his buddies, adventure and other women. Once he feels that he has experienced these things enough, then he will more likely be in a place to thing about settling down.

This, of course, varies from guy to guy. For example, your man may also be particularly focused on his career and feel that he wants to achieve certain things in that aspect of his life before he wants to get married.

Finances is also a big concern for most guys when it comes to marriage. If he does not feel that he is in a place financially to be able to afford to get married and all that comes along with it, then the idea of tying the knot may make him feel a little anxious.

Related Article: Exact Signs He Wants To Marry You

Test His Readiness

It is important never to put pressure on your boyfriend as this can be a reason why some guys pull away.

It can be a good idea to talk about marriage with him to gauge where he’s at. However, subtlety is the key.

Try to avoid bringing up the subject of marriage bluntly or starting a conversation with the topic. Instead, a more covert way of bringing up the subject is to wait until the theme comes up in your environment when you’re with him. For example, if the two of you are watching TV together and a program about weddings and marriage comes on then it seems more natural to start a conversation about marriage.

You can also test his readiness by seeing if he is willing to have a meaningful commitment to you in other ways, such as moving in together or getting a pet together.

5 Ways To Get Him To Propose

1) Spend time with couples that are already married

Going on double dates with your boyfriend and another married couple is a great way for him to start to feel more comfortable with the idea.

Make sure you pick a couple that has it together and are both apparently very happy being married. Furthermore, if there happens to be a couple of your friends that are married and your boyfriend looks up to, respects or admires the guy for whatever reason, then hanging out with that couple will help to condition him to the idea that marriage is a good thing.

Taking this subtle approach is a great way to avoid honest conversations that might prove uncomfortable, as well as ultimatums which can actually destroy relationships.

Most men, contrary to popular belief, are just as afraid of being alone as women, so they often want to get married eventually, but they also want to be in a happy space and not feel trapped.

If you get your boyfriend to see that some of your friends have happy marriages, he might just start envisioning himself in one, as well as you being the better half of it.

As relationship expert, T Dub explains, there are predictable thought patterns that almost all guys have that cause them to hesitate when it comes to marriage. To find out what they are listen to T Dub explain all here.

2) Covertly bring up the subject

If cramming the social calendar with time among happily married couples doesn’t nudge your long-term boyfriend to leap, then start working marriage into small talk and conversation with him.

Talking about the benefits of marriage, in general, can help him to see aspects of the commitment that he may not have thought of before.

When you have successfully brought up the subject, asking him questions about what his views are on marriage and if he feels he would one day get married himself.

Through a good, open conversation, you should be able to find out what he thinks about the possibility of the two of you getting hitched one day. Again, it is very important how you bring the subject up as you don’t want the conversation to start with him on the defensive.

Just remember that this particular tactic loses its subtlety pretty quickly. Mentioning marriage in conversation two or three times is probably going to be enough for him to take a hint so don’t keep bringing it up again and again. Therefore, when you do get your opportunity to talk about it, be ready with your questions ahead of time to reduce the need for bringing up the subject multiple times.

See also: Find Out If He Loves You

3) Help him understand engagement clearly

an engagement ringLetting him know that although engagement is a pre-cursor to marriage, it does not necessarily need to follow quickly. Letting you man know that once engaged you are happy to spend some time enjoying the engagement process for a while will help to make him fee more comfortable popping the question.

Start dropping hints about your ring preferences, but be careful not to over-do it.

You might not want to specifically say “engagement” at any point, but you can casually mention the recent rings of your friends and why you like them or not.

A more subtle way of doing this is to wait until you are together with your boyfriend and one of your friends who is either engaged or married. Then, taking your friend’s hand and saying something like, ‘Oh wow, I love your ring so much, I really like X, Y Z about it’.

Make sure your boyfriend is in earshot of the conversation is essential, or better yet, also asking your boyfriends opinion on the ring. This will help put the idea in his head and also to give him some clue about what kind of rings you like.

Engagement and wedding rings are something rather special, so also drop hints about what types of diamonds you like, in particular with regards to cuts, sizes, and colors.

If you can find a way to mention your particular ring size in conversation, you might be doing your guy a huge favor. He might be wanting to propose, but has no idea how to get a ring for you behind your back. If you feel it would be okay with him to be less subtle about this, then find a reason to take him to a ring store and try on a few things.

See also: What guys really want from a woman in a relationship

4) Start talking about the future

Or start talking about the future differently. Start peppering conversations with phrases like “if we’re still together,” “if we have kids,” or “if we own a home.” His reactions to that imagery will let you know if his head or heart are also going in that direction.

Anytime you mention the future, say “we” instead of “I” regarding goals and ambitions. If he wants to be a part of your future, he’ll probably pick up that in your vocabulary and feel more of a connection to you. If not, you’ll know soon enough.

5) Arrange a romantic trip away together

couple on holidayIf you’re confident he’s ready to propose, and you’re willing to roll the dice, schedule a romantic trip somewhere together. Make sure that the trip is at least two or three months in advance so that he has time to figure out if he wants to propose and then get ready.

However, try not to pin all your hopes on him proposing to you on the trip as he may not if he is still not ready. Just enjoy the trip together, but give him the opportunity to make his move.

If he really loves you, your happiness will be important to him, and if he knows you would love getting asked the question there and then, he might just make it happen.

While Hollywood often portrays the supposed dream proposal as a shock, women are rather intuitive and mostly know it’s coming in advance, even if they don’t know when and where specifically. So look for clues in his behavior to get an idea if he is also thinking this way, but don’t let on.

Even if he doesn’t propose on that trip, you might see couples that do propose, and that can inspire him for next time, so don’t be down-hearted.

Final Thoughts

These five ways to get your boyfriend to propose marriage to you will give you a whole toolbox at your disposal when you are ready to nudge your significant other into popping the big question.

If you are ready to move on to the grandest stage, romance can have, then choose one of these techniques and put it into play. With luck, your partner is dreaming of a lifetime with you already and is just dragging his feet. Here’s hoping your nudge sees you both go down the wedding aisle!

If after trying these techniques he is still hesitating, then chances are your man has one or more mental road block about marriage. If this is the case then discovering what his blocks are will help you to help him get passed them and take the plunge. To find out what’s holding your guy back and what to do about it to get him to commit, listen to relationship expert, T Dub explain all here.

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