American Dating Society

How To Win Him Back And Make Him Want You In 4-Steps

If you want him back but nothing is working, then I’m here to share the four steps. It’s safe to say that these steps aren’t just a hit and miss approach to getting your man back. I didn’t just see these work with ONE couple, and say great, let’s spread the word. Or what I’m really getting at, is that this isn’t about using some short-term trick like giving him the silent treatment, or not.

This is going to take you from start to finish. All the way to where you rebuild the loving, lasting, and stable relationship you’ve been after all this time.

Men cannot resist women who have this

Jane Lu created the four step system after working with hundreds of women who were stuck with one common problem… They had lost the man they love, and the desperately wanted him back. They too struggled. They watched their husbands and boyfriends chase after other women. And they sent text after unanswered text. Nothing was working.

That is, until Jane gave them these four steps, and everything changed.

Jane’s taken stock of the success rate, and this works about 95% of the time. Meaning that 95% of the women who use these four steps end up back together with their husbands and boyfriends.

You might expect that there was a fee for American Dating Society to learn Jane’s four step method. And there was. After all, it’s not uncommon for relationship professionals to charge upwards for $150 per hour!

Luckily for our readers, I can share the four steps right here in this article. But keep in mind. You may have a ways to go before he shows back up at your door. These four steps work, but they may not be quick. I’m not promising your ex is going to show up on your door step tomorrow, begging for you to let him back into your life.

What I am promising is this…

If you follow through with learning and applying Jane’s four step methd, he will want you again. Not only this, but at some point any communication barriers between the two of you are going to melt. Poof! The wall between you two will vanish and in it’s place will be the raw, unfiltered, pure love you deserve from him.

Sound like what you want? Great! Then let’s continue into what makes these four steps repair even the most damaged relationship.

The reality is this: Something broke in your relationship, and at this point you may not even know what it was.

And now you’ve got to build something that isn’t there. Here’s how…

These 4-steps can also be thought of as are the missing ingredients that cause men to either go “all in” with you. And without the BIG FOUR, men are wishy-washy. Either they go off and try to find another woman. Or they ghost you… not texting you back or calling you back for weeks or even months!

Men do this because they subconsciously sense that something very important is missing. That’s right! Most men can’t even put into words why they feel the urge to leave.

I recommend that you get a clear sense of these 4-steps with this article you will find down below. And then next, get the ebook version, which goes into detail on how to put the 4-steps into action right now to get him back.

For a limited time, you can get the complimentary ebook version of the four step method.

Inside you will learn:

  1. How the situation or environment can be working aginst you and getting him back.
  2. Why understanding yourself is where you need to start.
  3. How to approach your ex and start the rebuilding process
  4. Most importantly, this little guide includes how to NOT get stuck and how to prevent another breakup once you’re back together

Click here to get the book

To have the best chance of bringing that relationship back, you’ll need to go through the following four steps.

A breakup is always a difficult experience to go through, but it doesn’t need to be the end. Whether you were married or in a committed relationship with your boyfriend, you may be able to rebuild the relationship.

You two were together once before, and if you put in the work, you could start anew and make your relationship even stronger. What rebuilding your relationship looks like (personal story)

But it’s important to understand that you can’t take shortcuts when you do this. Otherwise, you’ll likely end up with the same problems as before.

1. Understanding the Situation

You first need to develop clarity regarding the situation that led to your breakup in the first place. To fully understand the breakup, there are several key questions you’ll need to answer yourself, such as:

  • Who initiated the breakup? Was it you, him or was it mutual?
  • Was this a spontaneous decision or something that had been building for some time?
  • What was the final straw that led to your breakup?
  • Have you two previously had a pattern of fighting and making up?

The answers to these questions can help you figure out the likelihood of getting back together and whether that’s a good idea. Even though a breakup hurts, that doesn’t necessarily mean you should continue fighting for a relationship that isn’t working.

On the other hand, you don’t want to stick with a breakup that the two of you regret if there’s a chance you could resolve your issues. Your breakup may have been a spur of the moment decision motivated by intense emotions.

Click here for more about step 1

2. Understanding Yourself

After you’ve reflected on the circumstances surrounding your breakup, it’s time to focus on building self-clarity.

It can be difficult to really understand yourself when you’ve been in a long-term relationship. Your significant other becomes a huge part of your life, to the point where going on without him feels empty in comparison.

The emotions you experience post-breakup can cloud your judgement. You may feel like you’re never going to find a relationship like that again. It’s important to take an honest look at what your relationship was really like.

Think about how you felt while you were in the relationship. How was your self-esteem and confidence? Did you think your partner showed appreciation and love for you? And why do you want to get back together with your ex?

You may find that you’re simply looking for any solution to the pain you feel right now. Or you could truly believe that you and your ex are right for each other. You need to distinguish between whether you’re missing your ex or the feeling of being in a relationship, and that all comes from understanding yourself.

Click here for more about step 2

3. Understanding Him

Even if you’re ready to give your relationship another chance, your ex must feel the same way for you two to get back together, which is why you need to understand how he feels.

This is obviously more difficult than understanding yourself. You can’t simply look within to find your answers. Understanding your ex requires communicating with him openly and honestly.

Before you meet with your ex, you should figure out exactly what you’ll want to talk about with him. A meeting like this can be an emotional experience, and it’s easy to get sidetracked. Planning what you’re going to discuss can make a world of difference.

What’s most important is that you get your ex’s thoughts on what happened and what needs to change with your relationship in the future, if you two both want to give it another try. It’s vital for you two to communicate and figure out how you’re going to improve yourselves and have a better relationship.

If your ex doesn’t want to meet, it’s best to begin moving on. He may change his tune later, but you can’t get anywhere without communicating with him. If he’s simply refusing a meeting to play mind games, he’ll likely contact you when you stop trying. However, you may want to consider carefully if you want to be with someone who acts that way.

Click here for more on step 3

4. Understanding How Not to Get Stuck

By understanding the situation, yourself and your ex, you’re already in a much better position to rebuild your relationship than most people would be. But that doesn’t mean it’s going to be easy. Plenty of couples jump back into a relationship, only to have the same fights and another breakup as a result.

You and your ex probably both made some mistakes in how you handled things when you were in a relationship. The best course of action is to work on improving yourself independently of your ex. Change anything you don’t like about yourself and let go of any hurt feelings from your past relationship. If you carry those with you, they’ll have a negative effect on any new relationship.

Ideally, your ex will be working on himself, as well, although this isn’t something you can control. If you two both commit to bettering yourselves, then you can start a new relationship that’s far better than your last one.

By understanding this four-step approach to rebuilding a relationship, you can improve the odds that you get back together with your ex and that you two have an even stronger relationship than ever before.

Click here for more on step 4

This guide covered the basics, but to have a full understanding of what you should do, you should read the full four steps in the How She Wins Him Back eBook. It’s available free of charge and goes over every one of the above steps in detail, ensuring that you have the best chance of success.

Read How She Wins Him Back here and start the process towards rebuilding your relationship today! Click here to get it for free

What Rebuilding Your Relationship Looks Like…

While breaking up with someone is certainly tough, I almost think it’s harder to go through a separation period. With a permanent breakup it’s over and it becomes a matter of healing and moving on. When I endured a temporary breakup with my spouse, the future was unknown, and I found it to be very unsettling not to know where I stood with him. Even though the split was a very emotional rollercoaster ride that lasted close to eight months, I do think that temporarily breaking up made us a stronger couple and I learned many important lessons as a result.

Sometimes you have to move backwards to go forwards. This was one important lesson I learned throughout my ordeal and was definitely a tough one. Prior to breaking up, my spouse and I had been living together for several years in a seemingly committed relationship. So once we decided to split up, it just didn’t make sense to me how we would be working on our relationship yet no longer living together.

While this change was certainly challenging, I think it was beneficial for us overall. We each had our own space in which to think. For me, I thought a lot about what kind of person I was, what kind of person I wanted for a partner, and what kind of person he was. I thought about our conflicts, unspoken problems and how we got to a point of such animosity. And to be honest, I cried; I cried a lot. But I also believe that sometimes we have to live through the bad to get to the good. I was able to take these introspections and lessons and go forward with stronger steps about who I was and what I wanted.

Be careful who you pour your heart out to.

There is no doubt that I had a lot of emotions during our time apart. Usually he would have been the one person I would unload all my stresses and feelings to. But since we were no longer a couple, and since he was now the problem, I had to go elsewhere for consoling. Therefore, I turned to family and friends to confide in; and it turned out that they weren’t all helpful. While I don’t think they meant any harm, some of them would make comments that made me feel even more hurt and confused. Hearing things like, “I always knew he was a jerk,” or “you can do so much better,” caused me additional angst. How was it that I could love someone and want to be with him when others were knocking down his character? But through this I learned to prioritize what things were really worth stressing over and what things weren’t.

A neutral party can provide clarity.

It’s unnerving to be a in a lengthy relationship and then see it dissolve. Problems and tensions suddenly surfaced that I hadn’t realized were simmering below the surface and caused us to split up. Before we decided to get back together, we decided to see a marital counselor, and this turned out to be worthwhile for both of us. Being in the relationship we couldn’t see our problems, and the counselor was a neutral person who gave us some clarity. This clarity allowed us to really identify problems and work on them together. Ten years later – as we now live together – we continue to identify and work on problems together.

Do you still feel stuck to rebuild your relationship and get him back? Click here to get the 4-step method book (FREE)

Now that you have the 4-steps, it’s time to put them into action so you can rebuild your relationship with the man you love.

With the release of our new program called How She Wins Him Back, we are giving away the ebook version for FREE! Why? For no other reason than we want you to understand these 4-steps. Because these 4-steps are the missing ingredients that cause men to either go “all in” with you. And without the BIG FOUR, men are wishy-washy. Either they go off and try to find another woman. Or they ghost you… not texting you back or calling you back for weeks or even months!

Men do this because they subconsciously sense that something very important is missing. That’s right! Most men can’t even put into words why they feel the urge to leave.

For a limited time, you can get the complimentary ebook version of How She Wins Him Back.

==> Click here to get instant access to the ebook version of this program for FREE

Inside you will learn:

  1. How the situation or environment can be working aginst you and getting him back.
  2. Why understanding yourself is where you need to start.
  3. How to approach your ex and start the rebuilding process
  4. Most importantly, this little guide includes how to NOT get stuck and how to prevent another breakup once you’re back together

==> Click here to get instant access to the ebook version of this program for FREE

Before we created the above guide on this particular topic of the proven 4-step method to rebuilding a relationship, we used to recommend the following information below. Although I recommend that you download the free book I told you about above, I’m still including the original info below because it’s still good for you to have.

Mirabelle Summers 2nd Chance Review

Click here to get The 2nd Chance

Who has this worked for? I don’t expect people will immediately believe me that this works. At least not until I share more with you. Most people who start looking for solutions are skeptical. In fact, many of our long time readers said they were skeptical when getting started. But now many of those who have followed the advice I’m giving you, are back together with their ex.

Ok, I’ve shared the best info and resources with you at this point. Now you need to scroll back up and investigate the method I’ve shared above.

Click here to get more updates from me


If you need to return to this page for additional support, I’ve included it below.

Here’s what I need you to do to make sure this will work:

If you will promise to do just those three simple things, I promise to help you to my full ability to get you back together with your ex boyfriend or ex husband.

Note: Please advise. This guide was created for the sole purpose of good will – to help other women understand how to get back the men they love. You should not use any part of this guide for wrongly manipulating men.

Let’s start with what not to do.

Learn the 3 toxic texts you should NEVER send to your ex here.

Sulking or acting needy are traits that the majority of men will not find attractive, especially if you are trying to win back a guy who has set ideals in mind for the girl of his dreams.

You want to try to stay away from jumping into one-nighters with him or falling victim to a drunk dial or two just because you miss him.

These are behaviors that will rarely win a guy over after a breakup and it can end up making you look weak or just push him away all together. Follow this nine-step plan to bring him back.

1. Does he want you back.

The first thing you will need to do is to find out if he still wants you back. If he has really moved on and is not interested in getting back together with you then you could be wasting your time or just end up embarrassing yourself in front of him.

Fortunately, there are three simple questions that you can ask to discover if he still wants you back. To find out what these questions are, click here now.

Many women will, unfortunately, experience how excruciatingly painful it can be when you’re still in love with a guy after your relationship has come to an end. There can be a lot of insecurities that can come over you, and the last thing that you want to do is let these feelings win.

EVERY PROBLEM IS TEMPORARY

Instead, you want to be able to overcome the dampened self-esteem and find a way to get back to who he fell in love with in the first place in order to win him back.

2. Accept why the relationship ended.

The first step in discovering how to get your ex boyfriend back is to first take a closer look and discover why the relationship ended. This is not just looking at the final conclusions that drew the relationship to an end, but rather to be clear on all the small steps over time that may have lead to that outcome.

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Even though your initial feeling might be to fight the end of your relationship tooth and nail, there could be a lot of strong points as to why it ended. If he gives you the reasons why it ended from his point of view, muster up the courage to listen to him with an open mind and try to understand what he is saying and how he is feeling.

Once you understand him, you can then start to see more clearly how the two of you might be able to patch things up and start to work on the issues that are causing the problems.

3. How to get him to talk to you again.

Here’s the letter you should write him after you breakup.

Are you two not talking now?

Or does it feel like there’s an impossible brick wall between the two of you?

Did you know people in successful relationships spend 5 hours or more each week talking? It’s common for breakups to happen because of issues with communication. And once the breakup occurs, communication may come to a complete halt.

Here is the way to jump start the flow again. Sit down and write a letter to him from the heart. Then put it in an envelope and give it to him. This will open him back up to wanting to talk with you again.

Not sure what to write in the letter?

If you want help with what to say, T.W. Jackson has a video explaining how you should write this letter.

If you’re not up for making a handwritten letter, then there’s another option – texting.

Some people say texting is your worst enemy.

Things could go wrong when it comes to getting

back together because of potential miscommunication.

Make sure not to send these 3 toxic texts you should never send to your ex if you decide to use texting instead of a handwritten letter.

Understanding his feelings will not only help you to get to know him on a deeper level, it will also help you to have a more harmonious and meaningful relationship with him and form a stronger connection if the two of you do get back together.

If there is something that you have done wrong then you need to find the strength to apologize and admit the fault. If this is the case then this is not the time to try to come out on top to be right. A lot of people can feel vulnerable when they are apologizing, however there is great strength to be found in vulnerability.

As he sees you apologizing, he will at the very least understand that you care about the relationship, and he will then also be more likely to take responsibility for whatever his role was in the breakup.

See also: How To Get Over The Breakup

4. Cut out the desperation.

Do you feel like you lost a piece of yourself? The reason is because you actually may have lost something very real. In 2010, the journal Personality and Social Psychology Bulletin found that a breakup often damages your sense of identity.

When couples come together, your concept of identity joins. When you breakup, you are not only physically separated. Your identity now has a serious gap to fill. Keep this in mind as you try to get him back. This will help you avoid feeding into potential feelings of desperation.

Even if the tears of sorrow may have worked for you in the past, don’t try to weep and convince him that he needs to come back. Being needy and desperate can be a real downer for most guys.

Men want to be with a woman who is happy with herself, up-beat and fun to be with. Although it is highly unlikely that you will feel like being the life of the party while you’re going through a break-up, not going to the other extreme by crying and acting desperate will definitely count in your favour when trying to get him back.

Wherever possible, and once you are able to do so after the painful period has passed, get back to being you, do things that make you happy and do all you can so you are living your life to the point of a radiance coming off you. Women who carry themselves in this way are very attractive to men.

Once he sees and feels this energy from you it can often lead him to rethink why the two of you are not together. You should never have to try to convince him that you should be together. He needs to be able to view you as his prize to win.

5. Help from experts.

If you’ve broken up with your ex, but you’re sitting there desperately searching for a way to get him back, wondering if there is still a chance for the two of you, then you may consider seeking out the help from a recognized relationship expert. Often, having the opinion and feedback from an expert can really help to make all the difference. Some experts will provide one-to-one help in person, over the phone or through Skype.

In the meantime, check out this video from relationship expert, TW Jackson offering some sound advice that may help you out. Here is his advice for people with relationship problems.

6. What was your role in the break up.

In most cases, a breakup is caused by the actions of both parties. Often it may seem like one person is completely at fault, but if you take the time to think about how you two have been relating to each other and the events leading up to the breakup, often you will find that there is in fact fault on both sides.

Even though it may be a tough pill to swallow, you need to think of what you may have done that caused the breakdown of your relationship.

If you are struggling to find the reasons why things may have ended, then try to think back to the first time you noticed that he was becoming more distant form you. Understanding why he pulled away can often tell you a lot about him, yourself and the relationship.

Cut out the idea of trying to blame him for the end and think of what may have also been your involvement specifically that may have added to the demise of your relationship. If you discover that there is fault on both sides, take the time to understand why it occurred, make peace with it and allow yourself to mentally note not to allow it to happen again if you get back with him or in any other relationship that you may find yourself in in the future.

The next step is to try to meet up with your ex boyfriend if you can. Verbalizing and more importantly, apologizing for what went wrong on your part is a great step in repairing the damage. He will realize that you value him and the relationship and appreciate your honesty and courage.

7. Making him want you again.

If you have ever heard the old saying that if you love someone set them free, you will probably know that there is a lot of truth to it. Most men love to divide and conquer. With that being said, don’t make it too easy for him to come back. However, before you get to this stage, you need to first build interest on his part in wanting to get back together with you.

Making him work for your attention will make him respect you all the more if and when you do get back together. The first steps to take is to learn how to make your ex miss you. Once you have achieved that you have already started him reaching for a re-connection with you.

Before you can do this, you need to discover if there is any chance in getting back together with him. Here is a simple three-step formula to quickly find out if there is still a chance for you guys.

From this point you can move on to the next stage of building the desire in him to want to be with you again. If the above three-step formula shows that there is still a chance of the two of you getting back together then it should be more than possible to re-ignite those flames of love quickly.

Just stop, and imagine the very man who just before didn’t want to be with you and even told you that he doesn’t want you in his life, turn into a romantic Casanova who won’t leave you alone and literally yearns to be with you. What if you were able to make his heart pound in his chest and feel a special kind of desire for you each time he thinks about you? What would you give to be able to have this effect on your ex boyfriend the next time the two of you meet?

The secret to having this effect on him is known by less than 1% of women on the planet, but is actually quite simple. You can find out about these secrets here.

8. Always put yourself first.

You may feel like you are important, but you also have to convey that you are important and that your feelings have value. This is going to be very attractive to him. Show him that you are happy with yourself and make it known that you love yourself.

Once you can do this, it opens the door for the two of you to re-connect again. Just like another old saying goes, you can never love someone if you do not love yourself first.

9. Own what you want.

In any relationship, you always have to be able to show that you know what you want. Do you have a vision for the future? If so, be clear and honest about it at all times. Let everything unfold as naturally as possible, but stand your ground when voicing what you would like to see the two of you doing in the future.

Even though it can be easy to become obsessed with the idea of winning your ex boyfriend back, the last thing that you want to do is let it take over your life as it can just set you up for failure once again.

There are all sorts of people out there today, and you need to make sure that you are never setting yourself up to be with someone who is using you in any way. You want to have a relationship with someone who has intentions of working with you as a team and will love you unconditionally for who you are.

If you start to get back together and you slowly start to notice that it seems as though he is in it for the wrong reasons, it is best that you re-evaluate your position and move on if you have to. In the end, you need to have a strong and healthy relationship that will allow the both of you to be happy and thrive.

If you are trying to win back a Scorpio man, click here.

Summary

Getting back together with your ex-boyfriend can be a challenge. You first need to spend some time reflecting on the relationship and all the events leading up to the breakup. What was your part in it? Taking the time to understand what went wrong will help you to avoid the same mistakes in the future.

If you are still sure you want him back after your time reflecting, the next step will be to find out if he still has any feelings for you at all and whether there may be a chance of the two of you rekindling the flame of love. This step is crucial, so if you haven’t done so already, take the simple test now to find out if he secretly still wants you back.

Finally, you need to work to build the desire in him to want to be with you again and see you in the same way he use to see you when things were exciting and new. You don’t want to leave anything to chance here. Sure he may still have feelings for you, but is that enough to stop him from wanting to experience other women while he is single??

To avoid this heartbreak and to ensure that you re-ignite the flame of desire for you within him and have him start to crave spending time with you more and more, go here now to learn the secrets of desire that will make him yours.

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